Today was an incredible day. It started later in the morning than I am used to.....I woke up to the sound of jackhammers in the backyard. I glanced over at the clock and couldn't believe that I had actually slept in till 8:45 a.m. I'm usually awake by 4 a.m. and am just too groggy to get up then. So I stay in bed and doze off and on until 7 a.m. when it's time to get up and get my husband off to work. Last night I took two Diazepam and two Gravols and that's why I slept in. I think I'll continue doing that on the days when I know I don't have to be up so early. I think it just might help me put the brakes on a little till I get to the doctor next week.
Shortly after I got up, my friend, Linda called to ask me if I would call a mutual acquaintance, Hannah, who is feeling very depressed and unable to cope anymore. I called her right away and she agreed that I could come over. When I talked with Hannah over the phone it was evident that she was pretty low so I threw on some clothes, dragged a brush through my hair, gulped down a muffin and dashed off to her place. On the way in the car I prayed....for wisdom, compassion, words that would help and comfort her. And I realized that God had been preparing me over the last ten weeks or so to be His hands, His heart in this particular situation. I could see purpose in the pain I suffered....pain that meant I could empathize and make Hannah feel free to share deeply with me what was going on in her life. I believe what I shared with her was a comfort and encouragement. As we cleaned up her breakfast dishes we talked about some things that would help her situation and I promised to help....... along with some other friends to carry her burden. Her face softened a bit. I hope she realized that "Help is on the Way". I arranged for someone to bring her a meal tonight and I'm going to pop in again with Michael W. Smith's new album. Perhaps it will bring a spark of hope.
(Names have been changed to protect the privacy of the women involved.)
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2 comments:
Purpose in the plan... Too bad we can't see that while we're going through it. On the other hand, it wouldn't be "the dark night of the soul - the valley of the shadow" if we could see it - and it wouldn't do its work in us either. I'm hoping that the next time I will understand deeply - whether it feels like or not - that there IS a plan. I guess that's called "growing in faith".
I'm so glad that you are once again down off the shelf - a vessel more purified - and put to good use!
Brenda,
I was thinking of you this morning as I was flying around my house doing a bunch of things and feeling sure that I can get my neglected house in order in ONE day! I was wondering if you had managed to keep a lid on your manic and I am glad to see that so far you are managing. Yes, there is purpose in suffering, God's purposes, so much greater than our own! I am glad that you can see an immediate use for your latest depressive episode, that of helping a friend.
Wendy Love
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