Wednesday, February 11, 2009
A Life Well Lived
I got to know my dad a whole lot better today....seeing him through the eyes of other lives he has touched. My respect and admiration for him has grown so much in only one day. All of his caregivers came to say goodbye to him today...each one deeply sorrowful at the passing of their client who had become a dear friend to them....each one saying that they don't usually come to funeral homes to pay respect to their clients. Others appeared out of the woodwork of our past sharing wonderful thoughts and memories of Dad....people I never dreamed of seeing. As I listened to their stories I stood up taller and my buttons began to pop. I am SO proud of my dad and how he lived his life. I'm sure our Father in heaven is proud of him, too!
Monday, February 9, 2009
My Cup is Full and Running Over
Anyone remember that song from their childhood? It's an apt description of how I feel right now, having just met our new grandson from China on Skype at 3 a.m. It truly is a miracle. The papers Alison and Shawn needed to receive him arrived just in the nick of time. I went to bed at 10 p.m. prepared to Skype with them at 5:30 a.m. but I was wide awake much earlier than that and a good thing, too, because they would have been out for dinner then and I would have had to wait much longer to meet Han Kun. I'll let Alison tell you all about him. All I can say is I'm in love already. He is a cuddler, clinging tightly to his new mom as she talked with me.
My cup is overflowing with the goodness of God. He has a big pitcher and just keeps pouring more and more in till it overflows. I am SO thankful for a good night's rest and the Lord's timing in waking me earlier than usual this morning. Now I can turn my attention back to the details that need to be attended to here and look forward to greeting friends and family in Windsor as we gather together to celebrate my dad's home going. I continue to cry buckets of tears but they are all tears of joy. How is that possible?......... I serve a mighty God!
My cup is overflowing with the goodness of God. He has a big pitcher and just keeps pouring more and more in till it overflows. I am SO thankful for a good night's rest and the Lord's timing in waking me earlier than usual this morning. Now I can turn my attention back to the details that need to be attended to here and look forward to greeting friends and family in Windsor as we gather together to celebrate my dad's home going. I continue to cry buckets of tears but they are all tears of joy. How is that possible?......... I serve a mighty God!
Saturday, February 7, 2009
I've Got the Joy, Joy, Joy, Joy........
My dad died early this morning and I'm sure many are wondering how I am handling it. Will the bubble burst and Brenda come tumbling out in a heap? I think not. My Father has been working behind the scenes to prepare me for this inevitable day. I stand in awe of my God...His bountiful love and mercy continue to overflow in my life even in the midst of this potential heart wrenching scenario.
A few months ago we began to share spiritual things with each other. I never knew this side of my dad before. God had obviously been working in his heart to prepare him for eternity.....in answer to my mother's continued prayers for him. He told me he was mending fences and he let me in on two of them. There may be others I don't yet know of. But I witnessed the mending of the last one this past Sunday evening just before heading back to Kingston after a visit. His work on earth was finally done.
I spoke with him on the phone twice during the day yesterday and he seemed fine and was looking forward to my visit today and the move to the retirement home on Monday. Sometime during the evening he told one of the nurses that he wasn't going to make it through the night. My brother was called in the wee hours and drove my stepmother to the hospital. They didn't quite make it in time. The nurse said he only suffered for the last two hours. In the meantime Rick and I were sleeping peacefully in Leamington. The call didn't come through at 3 a.m. because my cell phone was out of battery power and brother David didn't know where I was. The Lord knew I needed to sleep and arranged for that.
When the phone rang at 6:30 a.m., it was daughter Melody bearing the news that he had passed on. I was not shocked because the Lord had prepared me in a dream about a week ago. I dreamt that Dad died before he had a chance to move into the retirement home. I didn't share this dream with anyone because you can't always rely on dreams. Sometimes they are just crazy nonsense. This one obviously was not. I thank my loving Heavenly Father for His care and concern for me in the forewarning I received.
The crowning touch of my Father's loving hand was the date he chose for Dad's homegoing....my parent's wedding anniversary. Rick and I had talked about it in the car on the way to Leamington. I shed tears this morning but they were tears of joy, not sorrow. My father is in a better place free of pain and suffering and reunited with his beloved wife on their anniversary......and I know how special I am to my heavenly Father. I'm His favorite!.....just kidding.... :)
"And now brothers and sisters, I want you to know what will happen to the Christians who have died so you will not be full of sorrow like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus comes, God will bring back with Jesus all the Christians who have died. I can tell you this directly from the Lord: We who are still living when the Lord returns will not rise to meet Him ahead of those who are in their graves. For the Lord Himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the call of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God. First all the Christians who have died will rise from their graves. Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air and remain with Him forever. So comfort and encourage each other with these words." I Thessalonians 4:13-18
I look forward to the week ahead.....with joy....the joy of being with family and friends.....and celebrating my father's life together!
A few months ago we began to share spiritual things with each other. I never knew this side of my dad before. God had obviously been working in his heart to prepare him for eternity.....in answer to my mother's continued prayers for him. He told me he was mending fences and he let me in on two of them. There may be others I don't yet know of. But I witnessed the mending of the last one this past Sunday evening just before heading back to Kingston after a visit. His work on earth was finally done.
I spoke with him on the phone twice during the day yesterday and he seemed fine and was looking forward to my visit today and the move to the retirement home on Monday. Sometime during the evening he told one of the nurses that he wasn't going to make it through the night. My brother was called in the wee hours and drove my stepmother to the hospital. They didn't quite make it in time. The nurse said he only suffered for the last two hours. In the meantime Rick and I were sleeping peacefully in Leamington. The call didn't come through at 3 a.m. because my cell phone was out of battery power and brother David didn't know where I was. The Lord knew I needed to sleep and arranged for that.
When the phone rang at 6:30 a.m., it was daughter Melody bearing the news that he had passed on. I was not shocked because the Lord had prepared me in a dream about a week ago. I dreamt that Dad died before he had a chance to move into the retirement home. I didn't share this dream with anyone because you can't always rely on dreams. Sometimes they are just crazy nonsense. This one obviously was not. I thank my loving Heavenly Father for His care and concern for me in the forewarning I received.
The crowning touch of my Father's loving hand was the date he chose for Dad's homegoing....my parent's wedding anniversary. Rick and I had talked about it in the car on the way to Leamington. I shed tears this morning but they were tears of joy, not sorrow. My father is in a better place free of pain and suffering and reunited with his beloved wife on their anniversary......and I know how special I am to my heavenly Father. I'm His favorite!.....just kidding.... :)
"And now brothers and sisters, I want you to know what will happen to the Christians who have died so you will not be full of sorrow like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus comes, God will bring back with Jesus all the Christians who have died. I can tell you this directly from the Lord: We who are still living when the Lord returns will not rise to meet Him ahead of those who are in their graves. For the Lord Himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the call of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God. First all the Christians who have died will rise from their graves. Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air and remain with Him forever. So comfort and encourage each other with these words." I Thessalonians 4:13-18
I look forward to the week ahead.....with joy....the joy of being with family and friends.....and celebrating my father's life together!
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Bogged Down
I have been on the move from one end of the province to the other so that's why I haven't posted. I did write a couple of posts in the car while traveling and hoped to get them up when I reached Grosse Pointe but they were written in Open Office and Blogger wouldn't accept them. I am pretty computer challenged so I still haven't figured it out and nobody has had the time to help me. The next week is going to be another busy one as I will be traveling again to Windsor to help get my dad moved into a retirement home. Right now he's in the hospital again so I hope and pray it all works out. I'm very glad to be able to leave it all in my Father's capable hands. I love not being anxious about anything.
From my journal this morning: "Such wisdom I receive each day. Thank you, Lord, for what I learned in my desert experience. Help me to recall all You taught me so I will be a blessing to others in their time of need. I trust You today with the details of the move and the connections that need to be made. Prepare the way. I trust You with my traveling loved ones and those that are left behind."
From my journal this morning: "Such wisdom I receive each day. Thank you, Lord, for what I learned in my desert experience. Help me to recall all You taught me so I will be a blessing to others in their time of need. I trust You today with the details of the move and the connections that need to be made. Prepare the way. I trust You with my traveling loved ones and those that are left behind."
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Ten Steps Forward.....One Step Back.....or One Setback
I have been walking merrily along for a couple of months now with no real hardship. I seem to have a silver spoon in my mouth. Everywhere I go doors open and the right people walk through at exactly the right time. Connections are made and my path is smooth. I have joy indescribable. But this weekend was a step back......a whole bunch of steps back. I feel like I fell off a cliff! I reacted very badly to a situation involving some of my loved ones and I became very angry at what seemed to be gross injustice and negligence. I was hurt and the first mistake I made was talking it over with another family member. Next I began to stew about it and before I realized it, the Enemy had me in his clutches. I was trapped, backed into a corner and fighting mad! I knew I had reacted badly but I felt so justified. I also knew I just couldn't go to bed like this. In my memory bank I drew upon these words from Scripture: "Do not let the sun go down on your wrath" or in more modern language: "Don't go to bed angry."
So I went to bed with my laptop and Googled anger devotionals. I received just what I needed to hear.
Anger is an outward emotion. Underneath, however, are always feelings of fear, hurt, helplessness, or guilt.....or a combination of these. Since anger is a God-given emotion, it's not necessarily bad. If handled properly, it can be used for good and to create change. I was feeling better already! I had always pictured it as a negative thing. And now I was hearing that it can be a positive thing. There are several ways of managing anger. Suppression is denying you are angry and often results in depression. Open aggression is verbal or physical abuse meant to hurt the perpetrator. Passive aggression is shutting down, sulking or complaining behind another person's back. Assertiveness is the way God desires for us to handle our anger. It's a positive way of letting others know your thoughts and desires, while communicating in a respectful manner. It's Ephesians 4:15 in action. It's speaking the truth in love.
I put my laptop away and confessed my sin of verbal abuse and received my Father's forgiveness. I slept in peace and this morning He shed further light on my situation as I read from Streams in the Desert.
"This is My doing." (I Kings 12:21)
The disappointments of life are simply the hidden appointments of love. C.A. Fox
My child, I have a message for you today. Let me whisper it in your ear so any storm clouds that may arise will shine with glory, and the rough places you may have to walk will be made smooth. It is only four words but let them sink into your inner being, and use them as a pillow to rest your weary head. "This is My doing."
Have you ever realized that whatever concerns you concerns Me too? "For whoever touches you touches the apple of [My] eye" (Zech. 2:8). "You are precious and honored in My sight" (Isaiah 43:4). Therefore it is my special delight to teach you.
I want you to learn when temptations attack you, and the enemy comes in "like a pent-up flood" (Isaiah 59:19), that "this is My doing" and that your weakness needs My strength, and your safety lies in letting Me fight for you.
Are you in difficult circumstances, surrounded by people who do not understand you, never ask your opinion, and always push you aside? "This is MY doing." I am the God of circumstances. You did not come to this place by accident -- you are exactly where I meant for you to be.
Have you not asked Me to make you humble? Then see that I have placed you in the perfect school where this lesson is taught. Your circumstances and the people around you are only being used to accomplish My will.
Today I place a cup of holy oil in your hands. Use it freely, My child. Anoint with it every new circumstance, every word that hurts you, every interruption that makes you impatient, and every weakness you have. The pain will leave as soon as you learn to see Me in all things. Laura A. Barter Snow
I never cease to be amazed at how the devotionals and Scriptures I read daily speak to whatever is troubling me....on the specific day I need it!
And later today there was sharing of concerns and feelings and the oil of the Spirit flowed over us in forgiveness and reconciliation. Two steps forward!
So I went to bed with my laptop and Googled anger devotionals. I received just what I needed to hear.
Anger is an outward emotion. Underneath, however, are always feelings of fear, hurt, helplessness, or guilt.....or a combination of these. Since anger is a God-given emotion, it's not necessarily bad. If handled properly, it can be used for good and to create change. I was feeling better already! I had always pictured it as a negative thing. And now I was hearing that it can be a positive thing. There are several ways of managing anger. Suppression is denying you are angry and often results in depression. Open aggression is verbal or physical abuse meant to hurt the perpetrator. Passive aggression is shutting down, sulking or complaining behind another person's back. Assertiveness is the way God desires for us to handle our anger. It's a positive way of letting others know your thoughts and desires, while communicating in a respectful manner. It's Ephesians 4:15 in action. It's speaking the truth in love.
I put my laptop away and confessed my sin of verbal abuse and received my Father's forgiveness. I slept in peace and this morning He shed further light on my situation as I read from Streams in the Desert.
"This is My doing." (I Kings 12:21)
The disappointments of life are simply the hidden appointments of love. C.A. Fox
My child, I have a message for you today. Let me whisper it in your ear so any storm clouds that may arise will shine with glory, and the rough places you may have to walk will be made smooth. It is only four words but let them sink into your inner being, and use them as a pillow to rest your weary head. "This is My doing."
Have you ever realized that whatever concerns you concerns Me too? "For whoever touches you touches the apple of [My] eye" (Zech. 2:8). "You are precious and honored in My sight" (Isaiah 43:4). Therefore it is my special delight to teach you.
I want you to learn when temptations attack you, and the enemy comes in "like a pent-up flood" (Isaiah 59:19), that "this is My doing" and that your weakness needs My strength, and your safety lies in letting Me fight for you.
Are you in difficult circumstances, surrounded by people who do not understand you, never ask your opinion, and always push you aside? "This is MY doing." I am the God of circumstances. You did not come to this place by accident -- you are exactly where I meant for you to be.
Have you not asked Me to make you humble? Then see that I have placed you in the perfect school where this lesson is taught. Your circumstances and the people around you are only being used to accomplish My will.
Today I place a cup of holy oil in your hands. Use it freely, My child. Anoint with it every new circumstance, every word that hurts you, every interruption that makes you impatient, and every weakness you have. The pain will leave as soon as you learn to see Me in all things. Laura A. Barter Snow
I never cease to be amazed at how the devotionals and Scriptures I read daily speak to whatever is troubling me....on the specific day I need it!
And later today there was sharing of concerns and feelings and the oil of the Spirit flowed over us in forgiveness and reconciliation. Two steps forward!
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